Friday, May 6, 2011

Stress.. that's all.

I haven't blogged in a long time it seems, I just don't have time anymore . The semester is fixing to be over though, with today being the last day of classes and next week is finals week. Luckily I only have three finals, one on Monday and two on Wednesday then I'm done! I'm hoping that I will be able to blog more this summer. I have a feeling that it will be very, very busy as well!

I have also been very stressed out the last couple of days.. You would think that I wouldn't be with my wedding coming up and what not, but believe me.. I am. I can't help it, I have always been the stressed out type. College plays a big role in this.. Like I mentioned earlier I have almost completed my first semester of college, only seven more to go.... To me that sounds so depressing. From my experiences so far, I have come to the conclusion that college is a waste of my time right now.. I think maybe that I jumped into it to fast. I started 20 days after I graduated high school.. I thought it would be fun! I had some classes with a close friend of mine but after four months, I've had enough.
When I was in high school, I was a perfectionist. Everything was a competition and I had to be the best at it; my grades included. During my entire high school career, the lowest grade I ever received was a 93% which happened to be a spanish class I believe. When I went to public school, I had a GPA or 4.08 average and was ranked 4th in my class of 90 students. I strove to be the best but never quite made it. Now-a-days.. I don't care about that anymore. Life isn't school and it doesn't matter what "grade," I get. For some reason this goes for college as well.. I just don't have the heart for it anymore, I don't want it to be a competition anymore.
My classes for this semester consisted of General Animal Science plus a lab, Zoology plus a lab, Psychology, Univeristy Alegebra, and a weight training course. 16 hours in total, five days a week. Ansc was not all that bad, I knew most of the stuff that we talked about, although it did make me upset sometimes when the professor told us something that was all wrong, or that I thought was wrong. (I was told to keep an open mind and I did just that) The lab was alright to, we did get to do somethings outside of the classroom like palpate heifers and sheer sheep. Zoology was a bust in my opinion. The professor was one of the most unhappiest person I have ever seen. He was always late to class and never had any fun in class! This made it extremely boring so my learning capacity went out the window.. I tried to learn, I tried to study but in the end.. it was not good. The lab for Zoo was also quite interesting, I did fairly well in this class because the TA's made it fun and therefore I had a will to learn. And I found out that I can't handle to smell of rats soaked in formaldehyde. Yuck! Psychology is another story, it was interesting but I didn't like it.. end of story. Algebra? Don't get me started.. I used to love math and algebra in high school! Not anymore >:(  I thought I would fly through that class and Ace it. Boy was I wrong.. I kid you not, I knew everything that we discussed in class.. Everything! and yet it's possible that I may have to retake it! Of course if the professor wasn't such a loon.. I shouldn't be mean but she was one of those people that is very neurotic about math

All in all... I believe that I have disappointed my parents, wasted their money and wasted my time. I am seriously considering not going back next semester for reason's that are my own. I have been praying about it a lot but hopefully this summer I can figure it out...

I won't bore you with college nonsense any longer but it is the number one stress item on my list. The second is my fiancee. I don't know what I am going to do with him. He is having trouble with his stomach and keeping on weight. How is it possible that he weighs Less than I do? That's not right... I worry about him about he worries about things to the point of making himself sick. I've been praying for him as well.

That is all I really have to say tonight. It's almost midnight and I have to work tomorrow. So good night all!


  1. Sorry to hear you're stressed!! Sucks. Praying for yall that it all works out

  2. Don't stress! Your almost done, and before you know it, it will be July and ya'll will be relaxing and having fun in San Antonio!